On The Lamb

 

For those of you that don’t know, or care, or likely both: On the lam means “running away”

Don’t ask why, as nobody knows

 

On my way home from a late session at a bar I saw in the distance what looked like … what I thought to be an indescribable thing. Was it a dead dog? A drunken reveller in fancy dress? As I teetered nervously towards the thing it became abundantly clear. 

Wolf?

A pair of exceptionally stoned teenage boys I had passed earlier shuffled down towards the scene. As they approached I gestured up at the dark sky indicating the possible journey this object may have taken to arrive here. We looked at the stars for a fleeting moment … then instead of getting out their phones to film it, they began stroking it affectionately.

 

It was far too heavy for us to lift so we all went our separate ways, not the Sheep though. 

 Baaaahhhh Humbug

 The next day at the Nativity it was back in place. It looked like it had a bit of a night of it but was at least at work on time. All’s well that ends …

 

 But then on Monday I noticed the absence again

 

 

Then by Tuesday matters had taken a turn for the worse

 

Fear and loathing in a Manger 

 Then on Wednesday I saw this article

 

The above idea seems more like an anti-vax campaign, the implication being: Only Sheep Follow Rules. I do hope the poor thing makes it back eventually or I’ll have nothing more to say on the matter

LinkedIn’Agin

 

Reading about world affairs, in every sense of the word, is most often a depressing experience. So much information to take in and what can we do about it all? Every effect has a cause and vice versa. Here then is a tiny example from yesterday, of two News Stories placed on a front page, and laughingly, there is no attempt to make a connection between the two, as if they are entirely separate entities. Make of it what you will, want or won’t.

 

 

 

Cheapest Drug On The Market?

I seem to remember being told that if one drank seawater one went insane, then again if one is enjoying drinking seawater one is probably already half way there. I am not going to Google what the effects of seawater are, as Google tends to replace conversation with dull facts.

Here therefore is a beer I had to try. I had it with Oysters, filled with more seawater. Yesterday I had a few more bottles, they make you thirsty. I think I may be heading off to the beach with a bucket and pint glass.

Seawater_Beer.jpg

100 Things I Love (Part5)

21. I love waking up as the sun rises, usually around dawn. My mind is always filled with ideas for songs, poems, film scripts, a cure for cancer, then I drift back to sleep and all is forgotten.

Dreams.png

 

 Well, it depends on that dream doesn’t it 

Donald?


22. I love not having to work anymore: “The problem with not doing anything is you never get to take time off.” – Sebastian Horsley. 

Retirement.jpg

Count how much money you have in your pocket then calculate the chances of living long enough to spend it.


23. I love Sebastian Horsley. He was such a dear friend and like all my dear friends I lose them. I hope not carelessly. 

R.I.P


24. I love going to other town bars a few miles away. The anonymity is thrilling. It is like a cloak of invisibility. I can sit alone in public, my name is not shouted at me. I am reborn nameless. I could try flip flops.

Flip_flop.jpg

Do voyeurs like to be watched?

 

 

25. I love listening to film soundtracks on earbuds. The world is transformed. Crossing a road can become portentous, silly, ecstatic, deadly, pointless, but it is never just crossing the road.

Chicken_to_measure_it.jpg

 

 

“I’m using the chicken measure it”


I found a unicorn amongst the acorns

I was staggering back from a heavy bout of luncheon yesterday when in the clearing appeared a unicorn, minus horn. The flora and fawna were looking pretty psychedelic at that moment in time due to my penchant for Tio Pepe Sherry mixture. The phone somehow captured it. I think this animal was sleeping as it did not budge when I shouted at it, can they die standing up? They're like mammal tables really.

A Spot The Horse competition for the soberly impaired

 

Dalis Car Crash

One of the sadder things about this story on Peter Murphy, former singer of Bauhaus, is that many of his fans profess to be more devastated that he should be driving a SuBauhauru Forrester than the alleged possibility that he may have done some Crazy Shit that might have killed some poor Mother, including his Lowness. Perhaps they'd expected him to have been chauffered about in a Black Hearse, a far finer car to almost be killed in. What a shallow bunch they are. You Decide. As for the cops thinking he might be a flight risk, yes he can turn into a bat my dears.

12:55 am – 03/19/2013
Peter Murphy arrested for alleged DUI hit-and-run in Glendale

Peter Murphy, lead singer of British Goth rock band Bauhaus, was arrested Saturday after he allegedly rear-ended a vehicle in Glendale, injured the driver and then fled to Los Angeles, where he was blocked by an eyewitness until police arrived, officials said.

The eyewitness followed Murphy, 55, from the crash at Central and Goode avenues in Glendale to the 3400 block of Barham Boulevard in Los Angeles because “he was afraid [Murphy] would kill someone with his driving,” according to Glendale police.

Murphy, who was in a Subaru Forester, reportedly struck a Mercedes about 11:48 a.m. at the intersection, then drove around it and got on the Ventura (134) Freeway, police said. As he fled the scene, a witness who was washing windows, snapped a photograph of Murphy’s Subaru, which sustained moderate front-end damage.

The driver of the Mercedes was also able to write down Murphy’s license plate number before Glendale fire personnel hauled her away on a gurney, police said.

Meanwhile, the driver of a pickup truck reportedly followed Murphy to Los Angeles, where he pulled in front of him, blocked his Subaru and called Glendale police to tell them he was detaining Murphy.

Los Angeles police detained Murphy until Glendale police arrived.

Glendale officers said Murphy appeared to be at points “very confused” and had difficulty recalling the day and time.

Murphy denied drinking alcohol that day, adding that he had only taken his regular prescription pills for depression, according to police.

Murphy — who’s from England but lives in Turkey — reportedly admitted to being involved in a traffic collision, telling officers he was jet-lagged from a recent flight, police said.

Inside the Los Angeles police patrol car where Murphy had been detained, officers reported finding a small plastic bag, possibly of methamphetamine, police said. Murphy denied the bag belonged to him, but officers said they believed he was trying to discard it in the patrol car.

Murphy was arrested on suspicion of causing injuries while driving under the influence of drugs or alcohol, felony hit-and-run and possessing methamphetamine, police said.

He remained in custody Monday in lieu of $500,000 bail, which was set after officers expressed concern that he could be a flight risk, police said.

Murphy is best known for his lead vocals with the group Bauhaus, which recorded four albums and ignited the Goth rock movement. The group is known for its greatest hit “Bela Lugosi’s Dead,” as well as “She’s in Parties” and “Kick in the Eye.”

After Bauhaus broke up in 1983, he helped form Dalis Car and went on to record several solo albums.

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